What I REALLY Want For My Birthday

Why, yes, I'd love for Erin Andrews to be gift-wrapped. You know, if that's her thing, of course.

Inspired by Jeff's post at The Big Dead Sidebar, here is a list of things I would like for my birthday in addition to what Jeff mentioned. Hope it's not too late.

1. A date with Erin Andrews. Will settle for Megan Fox, Reese Witherspoon, Jessica Alba, Meagan Good, Scarlett Johansson, Eva Mendes or Erin Andrews' hot sister.
2. A Cubs win. Because they can't lose to Ross Ohlendorf and Virgil Vazquez on back-to-back nights, right?
3. An advance copy of Jay-Z's next album.
4. Kanye, Jay-Z and Drake on one track.
5. An announcement by Lil' Wayne in which he retires from using the autotune.
   
6. A 1-day studio session with T-Pain in which I use the autotune to produce my own CD.
   
7. An announcement from Mariah Carey's publicist that she is divorcing Nick Cannon and heading to Carbondale, Ill., to get away from it all.
   
8. For SIU to use their final remaining scholarship on 6-10 forward Roscoe Davis.
   
9. A time machine, so I can have Lindsay Lohan (circa Mean Girls) all to myself.
   
10. Carrie Underwood and Taylor Swift jumping out of a cake to sing me happy birthday.
    

This is my party, so get fly if you want to

Today, yours truly turns 23. This is the age when you realize that the only thing about being older is that the price on your insurance premium goes down. On the other hand, the only milestone birthdays come with zeros at the end of them.

With that said, here are my favorite songs since I've been born.

1. I'm On A Boat (2009) by The Lonely Island feat. T-Pain
2. My President (2008) by Young Jeezy feat. Nas
   
3. Hey There Delilah (2007) by The Plain White T's
4. Make It Rain (2006) by Fat Joe feat. Lil' Wayne
5. We Major (2005) by Kanye West feat. Nas
6. Drop It Like It's Hot (2004) by Snoop Dogg
7. Ignition Remix (2003) by R. Kelly
8. Air Force Ones (2002) by Nelly (At this time in my life, I actually had a pair of the special edition Puerto Rican AF1s)
   
9. The Cha Cha Slide (2001) by Casper
10. Big Pimpin' (2000) by Jay-Z feat. UGK
11. Cowboy (1999) by Kid Rock
12. Still Not A Player (1998) by Big Pun feat. Joe
    
13. Lovefool (1997) by The Cardigans
14. I Believe I Can Fly (1996) by R. Kelly (How awesome was the soundtrack to Space Jam?)
15. First Of Tha Month (1995) by Bone Thugs & Harmony (How can I leave a song about the 1st of the month off this list?)
    
16. I'll Make Love To You (1994) by Boyz II Men
17. Gin & Juice (1993) by Snoop Doggy Dogg
18. Smells Like Teen Spirit (1992) by Nirvana
19. O.P.P. (1991) by Naughty By Nature
20. Ice Ice Baby (1990) by Vanilla Ice
21. Funky Cold Medina (1989) by Tone Loc (This one is self explanatory)
22. Pour Some Sugar On Me (1988) by Def Leppard
23. Never Gonna Give You Up (1987) by Rick Astley
24. Kiss (1986) by Prince

Obviously, there are hundreds of more killer tracks, but there are some that just caught my eyes and ears as I scrolled through my iTunes.

Birthday Sex? Sounds Good To Me!

Birthday sex? Yes, please. (Austin Powers'd)

I'm 23. Woo!

And unless I make it rain, pass out on a park bench and wake up asking myself why is this pretty girl in my bed, it won't be considered to be a celebration.

All jokes aside, thanks to my Mom and Grandma and everyone else who helped raise me. And a special shout out to my friends, who surely will get me intoxicated to the point where I imagine all the stuff mentioned above actually happened.